You want to write some doggerel?
I’ll tell you what to do…
The first thing: make your readers laugh
at what should make them spew.
That done, the next agenda is,
be certain to offend.
Then force your rhyme: be sure each line
displays a blunt, rough end.
Then choose a metric pattern that
is hard on eye and ear;
Use words that make a sailor blush;
that readers loathe and fear.
I swear that this is easier
than falling off a log, girl;
Just sit you down and write your worst…
AND WHAT YOU HAVE IS DOGGEREL!
- The Yellow Doggerelist
(In honor of Ogden Nash’s birthday, 1998.)
Copyright © 1998 Stephen S. Bates
